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When “Ultimate Man” Really Means “Ultimate Sissy”

I frequent the website Uncrate because I constantly struggle with my materialistic side and they occasionally highlight very stylish or well-designed items that lead me to more interesting website. Uncrate purports to be a space for the consuming man with entries about cars, video games, gadgets, clothes, movies, etc.

But how on earth, on the same page as a book all about bacon, can you have a $13 bar of soap?!?

screenshot of Uncrate.com

Notice that the bacon post came later (in typical blog top-posting fashion). Maybe they were trying to compensate for their lameness. I mean, why bother calling the soap “Ultimate Man” when it’s followed immediately by “Body Scrub”? That’s like selling a pint of Guiness with a paper umbrella in the glass. And really, what ultimate man wants to get rid of those rough elbows and heels?

This isn’t the first time Uncrate has crossed the line from stylish cosmopolitan man into whack man. Just yesterday there was some organic facial cleanser, and let’s not forget (but really, let’s forget…please…) the Man Makeup.

Yeah, sure, I could stop reading the site, and maybe it’s getting to that point. I’m just don’t understand the incongruence between posts about beer, sports, gadgets, and even fashion items, with overpriced cosmetics and skin care products. My guess is they have some sponsorship ties…

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